If you haven’t seen this, check it out. Look past the subtitles for an artistic, upbeat and informative piece about a gender diverse teen. She’s adorable!
Teen Talks Blockers
09 Thursday Feb 2012
Category Archives: gender identity
Not Lost Anymore
29 Sunday Jan 2012
Tags
childhood trauma, gender diverse kids, Jazz, overcoming pain, releasing doubt, second chances, starting over, transgender kids
A muscle in my shoulder twitched before it went numb and then the dreaded pins-and-needles phase began. I wouldn’t move my thumping limb; however, as I felt that the barrier it provided from the rest of the world was more important than, oh, being pain-free. Ironic it would be the same shoulder crushed in an unfortunate and near fatal horse riding accident. Some nights I still wake up, now thirty years later, and I’m laying on my back with my lifeless thumping arm in the same traction position. Throwing the covers off from sweating, I’m just thankful it wasn’t a dream where I’m trapped beneath Scorpio’s hooves battling for my life.
Integration
25 Wednesday Jan 2012
Tags
activism, challenges, confidential, Jennifer Carr, living stealth, privacy, pseudonym, transgender advocacy
While prepping for a talk at the University of Chicago today I brought up my YouTube video and saw a face I hardly recognized. She hid behind her trusty glasses, her voice slow and steady as if she was choosing her words as carefully as she would select which colored wire to cut. One slip and kaboom!
Fiddling with the adaptors for the sound I commented to a person helping to organize the event that I hardly wore my glasses anymore when speaking. After I said it I felt an immediate sense of hiding I felt uncomfortable with back then, and now.
“What’s changed,” she asked.
“I guess I get less threats now…” I replied, and then the gravity of what I said sunk
True, All-Person Experience
22 Sunday Jan 2012
Tags
Girl Scout cookie boycott, Girl Scouts, inclusion, Parks and Recreation, segregation, transgender kids
My Brownie uniform
“True, all-girl experience,” those were the words of the teen named Taylor who is part of a group trying to get people to boycott Girl Scout cookies because the Girl Scouts allowed a transgender child to belong to a troop as reported by CNN Living, on January 13, 2012.
There’s so many things that I find bewildering… where to start? First, I think it’s bizarre that we have to segregate boys and girls in groups. I was a Brownie, and even 30 years ago I thought it wasn’t fair. Why couldn’t there just be Scouts so that everyone could join?
From a Deep, Deep Sleep
03 Tuesday Jan 2012
Posted in acceptance, belief, Buddha, challenges, compassion, coping, family, fear, friends, gender diversity, gender identity, gender non-conforming, gratitude, grief, happiness, holidays, joy, life lessons, love, support, transition, uncategorized
Tags
awareness, compassion, gender diverse kids, gifts, gratitude, holiday cards, holidays, love, my kids, new day, parenting
Yawwwwn. As you might have noticed I took a tiny writing hiatus for the holidays so that I could mentally, physically, spiritually and emotionally step back and just observe.
I’d love to share some revelations with you. Some epiphanies are big and need a little explaining. Some are silly. All of them sunk into my psyche in a deep, meaningful way during my vacation and without judging, I had a way of being with this awareness in a completely new way, like being taken to a party where I didn’t know anyone. I had to feel my way around, ask questions, and above all else, I had to listen. So, let’s begin…
Boston Globe Article Talks About Real Life
16 Friday Dec 2011
Tags
bathrooms, Boston Globe, HRC, identical twins, parenting, school, transgender youth, transitioning young
If you haven’t read the latest Boston Globe article about a family that supports and advocates for their transgender child, and her identical twin brother. The power of love!
Clinging to the Shore
09 Friday Dec 2011
Tags
acceptance, challenges, communication, coping, emergency, ER, fear, gender diverse kids, medical providers, school, transgender kids
“Check in with your chaperone… Know where your medicine bag is… Talk with them before you leave… Before you leave, Hope!”
I felt myself go over the edge as I quizzed Hope this morning, yet I couldn’t bring myself to stop. Her life literally depends on this information and yet the more I pound in the who-what-where she peacefully glances out the window daydreaming about fairies and princesses and the next Judy Moody book. My panic is all mine.
Once the field trip form popped into my inbox, the gravity of the situation came into clear focus as though never before; she could potentially be in danger and not have anyone know how to help her. Like many children these days, Hope has a peanut allergy and carries a medicine bag with her 24/7. Allergies, and so much more.
Dreamy Reality
26 Saturday Nov 2011
Posted in acceptance, belief, community, coping, education, gender diversity, gender identity, gender non-conforming, gender variant, happiness, joy, LGBTIQ, life lessons, love, school, support, transgender, transition, uncategorized, yoga
Tags
acceptance, boys who feel like girls, coping, gender diverse kids, girls who feel like boys, parenting, school, students, support, teachers, transgender, Truth
Waking up from a hazy savasana, I sat up to notice the dozens of teachers and students sprawled out on the benches around me. It dawned on me that moments before I’d been giving a talk on gender identity, expression and diversity at a local grammar school. I’d forgotten completely.
A wash of relief spread from the crown of my head and covered me like hot fudge melting down a cold scoop as I recalled the acceptance I felt as I talked about girls who feel like boys and boys who felt like girls. The supportive nods from teachers and the thoughtful questions produced by curious minds. But tell me again how we ended up laying down?
Revealing Family Secrets
25 Friday Nov 2011
Posted in belief, birth names, compassion, coping, discussions, family, fear, gender diversity, gender identity, gender non-conforming, gender variant, happiness, holidays, LGBTIQ, life lessons, love, memories, my childhood, parenting, school, secrets, siblings, stealth, transgender, transition, uncategorized
Tags
being outed, boundaries, confidentiality, discussions, friends, gender diversity, outed, privacy, school, secrets, siblings, stealth, transgender
“Children should be seen and not heard.”
How many times did I hear this when I was little? After a while I didn’t need it whispered into my ear anymore, I embodied it. I knew there were things I was never expected to say, at home or out in public, like they never happened. Off limits for good, like a dangerous abandoned mine.
Transgender Doesn’t Describe the Spectrum
27 Thursday Oct 2011
So you must have seen the recent controversy about a child who was turned down by the Girl Scouts of Colorado because he is a boy who expresses himself as a girl.
Here’s my difficulty, the article explained that this child is a boy (who was born a boy) who presents as a girl. Then they labeled the child a “transgender boy”. In my world a “transgender boy” means a natal female child who identifies and presents as a male. The child in the Girl Scouts controversy appears to be the opposite, a boy who presents as a girl. How did the transgender term get so mixed up here?
From the way the article depicted the child and the family, this child doesn’t have a problem being described as a boy, using his original name or using the “he” pronoun. Tell me if I’m missing something, but most recently the media has latched on to the label “Princess Boy” in similar situations, not “transgender boy”. Why was the term “transgender” used in this way? Should we go back to The Transgender Child and brush up on our terms?
Trust me, I’m not a fan of labels for this very reason. This kind of ambiguity that confuses the media (and therefore the community) is one of the reasons that I use the term “gender diversity”, so that all identifications and expressions are represented and respected. It’s this type of transgender labeling, especially when it doesn’t accurately reflect the reality of the child, that makes parenting a gender diverse child more difficult.
I wish the best outcome for the child and the family. Unfortunately I know firsthand how hard it is to stand up for what you believe in, and have people misunderstand both the situation, and your motives. I think we all agree that all children should have the right to express themselves genuinely and freely, no matter what label you try to attach to them.
