The Universe can gently (or forcibly) wake us up. Like a cosmic slap in the face, we snap out of our dreams and numb slumbers in a sobering instant.
Last weekend I found myself sailing head first down a flight of stairs like I was in an action movie that just went slow motion to highlight my stellar kung fu moves.
As soon as I slipped I recalled every single TV show and movie where people fell down the stairs. It didn’t look so good. They always landed in a heap at the bottom of the stairs with legs pulled tight behind them like a carnival contortionist. An arm outstretched to brace the fall, only for the elbow to be facing inward instead of out. Head cocked unnaturally sideways with a tiny drop of blood escaping their lifeless lips.
Hell no.
I decided it at stair 3.
This is not the way I’m going down.
I tucked and rolled and eventually let go. Once I finished my bumpy descent, I popped up like my name was called on The Price is Right. My arms reaching for the sky. My feet a full foot off the ground.
I made it! I’m here! I’m alive…
After several Advil I spent some time in meditation, open to the message of this terrifying event. Life woke me up.
Over the past few months I’d slowed down to the point that I was carefully walking through jelly, safely daydreaming. I was taking it all for granted. The connectedness of our existence. The magic in these moments. The fragility of a simple bathroom break that led to cracked ribs, a lopsided down dog, and some gasp-worthy bruises poolside.
That feeling of falling lingers with me haunting my summer haziness, forcing me to bring my awareness to the present and really be here. The memory challenges me… to love more than I thought possible, to give everything without question, and sometimes, even fall fearlessly into whatever lies ahead.
Sometimes it is nice to walk around in a slight fog, Ignoring the problems of life because at the moment they aren’t too pressing or depressing. A dear friend, recently transitioned, happy to finally be fulfilled, and then…cancer. How fragile life is. We do the best that we can, then it all falls apart, cancer, rejection, a fall down the stairs.
“All part of God’s plan” some say. So we get back up, take the ALeve and carry on; because our loved ones need us. That is also part of God’s plan.
Love,
Katie
So true, Katie. My mom sent me flowers when I was in college a s I saved the card. It simply read, “Keep truckin”… How simple, yet how powerful. Pop up and get ready for the next adventure. After this fall, I know I can face whatever comes my way. Bring it!
Thank you for being a source of joy.
Your instincts are wise. They teach if you fall down don’t try to brace your fall with your hands, you’ll sprain or break your wrists, but to cover your head and roll. I can understand the falling down. A few weeks ago I took had a pinched Siactic nerve to the right leg and took a step and the leg buckled completely in pain from the hip to the toes and down I went with a thump. The MRI revealed a moderate bugling disc, healed with time, but for 5 days not even Percocet dulled the pain to stand, walk or sit. Just feeling no pain is reason to rejoice and now time will heal the numbness (knee to toes).
Dear Scott- I am so sorry to hear you are hurting. There are joys to experience around every corner. The Universe has this way of making it really crystal clear for me sometimes. I hope that your pain subsides and you experience that joy more than ever before. xo Jen
Thanks. The pain has subsided to a minimum on occasion, but the front of the right leg is totally numb from above the knee to the toes. Now it’s just time, but it put my hiking and running on hold until it can take the stress. I have to get back to my stretching exercises and start physical therapy.