To dream … the impossible dream …
To fight … the unbeatable foe …
To bear … with unbearable sorrow …
To run … where the brave dare not go …
To right … the unrightable wrong …
To love … pure and chaste from afar …
To try … when your arms are too weary …
To reach … the unreachable star …

This is my quest, to follow that star …
No matter how hopeless, no matter how far …
To fight for the right, without question or pause …
To be willing to march into Hell, for a Heavenly cause …

And I know if I’ll only be true, to this glorious quest,
That my heart will lie peaceful and calm,
when I’m laid to my rest …
And the world will be better for this:
That one man, scorned and covered with scars,
Still strove, with his last ounce of courage,
To reach … the unreachable star …

Recently I discovered iTunes (just got my Mac) and titles of my favorite music of all time starting flashing before my eyes. One of the first things I downloaded was the soundtrack to Man of the La Mancha. Now that might not be the first thing someone of my age group downloads, I know, but hear me out.

Growing up my parents did a fabulous job of exposing my sister and I to amazing culture. You name it and we experienced it. We enjoyed the ballet, the symphony, the opera and many, many plays. My favorite of all of these was Man of the La Mancha. Don Quixote’s quest for the Impossible Dream resonated with me so strongly even then. The imagination, the love, the courage- it was like the play was speaking to me personally.

Equally smitten, my Dad got the eight track tape which we played it over and over (much to the dismay of the people working for my parents). Each time I heard the music something swelled within me, like a sense of pride or admiration. Inside I vowed if I ever needed to do something really extraordinary, I could. I’d just think of Don Quixote and follow suit.

Despite persistent ridicule Don Quixote dared to love (and not the woman you’d expect) and even though it seemed hopeless, he dared to dream. Even though he wasn’t like the other people, he surely wasn’t alone. He had Sancho. Sancho, this lovable little character that was as true and genuine a friend as they come. It didn’t matter that Don didn’t have a firm grasp on what most people consider reality. What did matter was that Sancho cared for him and in the end, was loyal to him no matter what. Even Aldonza (his sweet Dulcinea) was convinced that the Impossible Dream was worth living for.

When Don Quixote meets Aldonza he sees the beauty of who she is and falls completely in love with her. Rather than accept the first taste of love she’s ever known, she simply cannot accept his sincerity. She’s learned to reflect what the harsh world has given her and remain bitter, angry and hateful. Aldonza was someone shunned by society and thought nothing of herself and therefore, could not bear the kindness he gently laid before her feet.

As a kid I didn’t grasp all the themes in the play. All I saw was Don Quixote’s bravery and tenacity. And I liked it. Today when I downloaded the soundtrack I listened with a new set of ears. I’m not sure if you’d call it wiser, but older at least. I saw myself in Aldonza, someone who distances herself from accepting love because she has been repeatedly hurt. Someone who doesn’t give herself any credit because she lets the past dictate her future sometimes. Good news is, I tell myself, she sees the light eventually. I even see a little of myself in Sancho, whose big, loyal heart gets him into some serious predicaments.

Yet still I identify with (what most people would consider a mentally challenged) dreamer who chooses to see the world in his own framework assuming an insurmountable task for the greater good. Most people would defer and say it’s someone else’s fight- the fight for the right in this world. But is it?

Am I tilting at windmills when I think these stories may help change the perception of trangender kids and their families? Am I foolish to feel that by sharing our lives here that we may open one heart or soothe another? I see this as my destiny, my quest.